Reminder to me..

I thought I better jot this down before the feeling quickly spirals down. After all parenting is just like a roller coaster.. you have your high's, and then you have your low's. ;)

I am grateful for my kids and to be a mom today! :) I woke up to Mike giving me a kiss and soon little Gracie kissing me too, telling me it was time to wake up and get ready for school... I had about 15 min to get her ready!! I was panicked!! I threw on my yoga pants and an over sized sweater and ran to Gracie's room, grabbed an outfit, then I ran downstairs quickly made her a PB and honey sandwich (her favorite) threw that in her lunch box with crackers and a water bottle. I can never put apple slices or carrots in her lunch because she won't eat it!! She barely even eats all her sandwich! that girl is all play and no eat. When she comes home, I have her sit down and eat the rest of her lunch while she does any school work the teacher sent home.. most day's there isn't. Mike had already fed her breakfast, so I quickly put her hair in a pony tail, put on her coat, and ran out the door! We barely made it! My favorite thing though, is when the bus pulls up and she is walking towards the door, she yells "I LOVE YOU MOM!!" and blow's a kiss. I was in this rushed feeling this morning and it had me feeling grumpy inside, but that sweet little girl reminded me of what really matters, and that is her and the relationship we are building. I don't want my kids to have more memories of me rushed and grumpy vs giving my full attention to them and being happy, even if we are running late. Worst case, I could've driven her and she would have still made it on time.

When I came home, Mike tells me how beautiful I look ( bed head and all!) haha ( think he forgot his contacts) and gives me a kiss. Another nice reminder of how blessed I am, unknown to him, I really needed that, I get so hard on myself and I don't see what he see's. Even though I know who I am, a daughter of God, there are moments when I am hard on myself and it's hard to see what other's do. There are day's when all I can see is everything I am doing wrong. Mike is one who loves to remind me of what I am not seeing.. he's biased, but I am lucky and so happy that he does see it. ;) Because he could be just be seeing Zombie Mommy and be totally justified in it. haha

After he leaves, the house is quiet, Michael and Abigail are still sleeping!! MIRACLE!! and so I lay down and rest for a sec..seriously.. a second and Michael comes to join me. We cuddle for a bit and then I hear Abigail through the monitor.. "mama.. mama..mama.." I just love the way she say's my name. It's so cute! She does it in her soft little 1 year old tone... unless she's mad.. then she is yelling in a raspy, bossy tone. haha.. So I go get her and she squeals when she see's Michael and Sunny. She gives them hugs and then she comes back to give  me a hug and a kiss. She hears her daddy doing his special whistle that he does for the kids, and she squeals again and goes running to find him. They exchange a hug and a kiss and then she is back down running to go play. Mike has to leave for work, gives me another kiss and is out the door.

That is how most mornings go, and you just get use to it and take it for granted and see nothing that special about it.. but today I reflected and woke up and saw how blessed I am. Everyday is special like this and I have sweet children who call me "mama" and a husband who calls me "sweetheart" and most days are crazy but if I had to choose a dream job, right now I think this would be it. I need to remind myself of that.. and probably as soon as this afternoon. ;)

I use to say when I was younger, that if I could be anything when I grew up, it would be a mom. It's not as glamorous as I thought it would be.. it's hard some days, it's tiring, and it never ends.. but taking that moment to look at these little one's that Heavenly Father sends for you to watch over is a huge blessing and the greatest task in the world. I get paid with slobbery kisses and messy, sticky hugs, stains on my cutest clothes, hysterical crying when I leave, eye's lit up when I walk in the door, and little voice's calling me mama and mommy.

Note to self, when I am having a bad moment, when the kids are grumpy, whiny, fighting, and screaming.. put them in their rooms and come re-read this post so I can remind myself they are actually angels too.... most, I mean some, err.. at  least half of the time! :/ haha..